I still really miss my older brother. When he passed away, it was during a huge time of upheaval in my life. My husband and I were trying to buy a new house as the townhouse we were renting wasn’t working out. We had just welcomed our now 2-year old into the world, and I was working on launching a new business. I was also still adjusting to having just moved to Kansas from California six months before. To say I wasn’t prepared for the depth of grief over the loss of my older brother would be a huge understatement. That’s why when I was offered the opportunity to review Modern Loss by Rebecca Soffer and Gabrielle Birkner, I jumped at the opportunity. I figured that the book could help my still-grieving heart.
The book offers a frank look at loss, at triggers, at what happens to intimacy, at the raw feelings. For me, it was really hard to read – even 2 years and some change after my loss. I probably have a lot of stuffed down feelings and issues, and honestly, it’s still really hard for me to talk about – in just the ways that sudden losses are. If you too are dealing with loss, this is a really honest and great look at grief in all of its forms.
About Modern Loss
• Hardcover: 384 pages
• Publisher: Harper Wave (January 23, 2018)
Inspired by the website that the New York Times hailed as “redefining mourning,” this book is a fresh and irreverent examination into navigating grief and resilience in the age of social media, offering comfort and community for coping with the mess of loss through candid original essays from a variety of voices, accompanied by gorgeous two-color illustrations and wry infographics.
At a time when we mourn public figures and national tragedies with hashtags, where intimate posts about loss go viral and we receive automated birthday reminders for dead friends, it’s clear we are navigating new terrain without a road map.
Let’s face it: most of us have always had a difficult time talking about death and sharing our grief. We’re awkward and uncertain; we avoid, ignore, or even deny feelings of sadness; we offer platitudes; we send sympathy bouquets whittled out of fruit.
Enter Rebecca Soffer and Gabrielle Birkner, who can help us do better. Each having lost parents as young adults, they co-founded Modern Loss, responding to a need to change the dialogue around the messy experience of grief. Now, in this wise and often funny book, they offer the insights of the Modern Loss community to help us cry, laugh, grieve, identify, and—above all—empathize.
Soffer and Birkner, along with forty guest contributors including Lucy Kalanithi, singer Amanda Palmer, and CNN’s Brian Stelter, reveal their own stories on a wide range of topics including triggers, sex, secrets, and inheritance. Accompanied by beautiful hand-drawn illustrations and witty “how to” cartoons, each contribution provides a unique perspective on loss as well as a remarkable life-affirming message.
Brutally honest and inspiring, Modern Loss invites us to talk intimately and humorously about grief, helping us confront the humanity (and mortality) we all share. Beginners welcome.
Purchase Links
HarperCollins | Amazon | Barnes & Noble
About Rebecca Soffer
Rebecca Soffer is the cofounder and CEO of Modern Loss. A former producer for the Peabody Award-winning Colbert Report, Rebecca is a nationally recognized speaker on the topics of loss and resilience. She is a Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism alumna and contributes regularly to books, magazines, and other media. Rebecca lives in New York City and the Berkshires with her husband and two children.
About Gabrielle Birkner
Gabrielle Birkner is the co-founder and executive editor of Modern Loss. She is a graduate of Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism, and writes regularly for national newspapers and magazines. A journalist and digital content strategist, she has served as managing editor at JTA, director of digital media at the Forward, and features editor at The New York Sun. Gabrielle lives in Los Angeles with her husband and two children.
I can’t imagine losing my sister … I can’t even begin to imagine how hard it is for you to deal with the loss of your brother. I’m glad this book was helpful to you.
Thanks for being a part of the tour.